Leo Tolstoy’s wise words have been cherished by readers all over the world for more than a century. While going through my father’s books after his death, I found a small, red hardcover titled “Wise Thoughts for Every Day.” The subtitle is: On God, Love, Spirit, and Living a Good Life.
I set it aside to keep, and eventually it landed on my own bookshelf. As I was reorganizing my office at the end of the year, I pulled it out and sat down with a cup of coffee to find out what prompted my dad to have it in his library. It didn’t take me beyond the introduction to understand.
My father didn’t believe in religion, although he would say to anyone who asked, he was a Druid. As a child, we did attend a Unitarian church briefly, which in retrospect was most likely because it was designed by Frank Lloyd Wright and a beautiful place to visit and meditate in the gardens.
After my elementary school years, we were on our own. My father encouraged us to explore faith and attend church with our friends if we were invited and curious. Our next-door neighbors were extremely religious and often asked me to their Baptist church with them and to summer Bible Camp, which their mom hosted. I don’t remember much about it other than the craft projects we did, which often focused on friendship and memorizing Bible passages for colorful patches. It obviously didn’t stick.
During high school, we invited a friend of mine to live with us for a year so she could be closer to our horse trainer and her horse. She was Jewish, so I learned about her religion through osmosis. My dad made her feel most welcome in our home and even celebrated Hanukkah with her, lighting the menorah he purchased for the occasion. I also attended my neighbor’s bat mitzvah around that time in a gorgeous temple and was impressed by her recitation of the Torah and the mesmerizing tradition of the ceremony.
But over time, organized religion has never been a part of my life. As with many horse people, we work and show on Sundays, and attending a church service just isn’t on our schedule. Do I believe in God? That’s a good question. I believe that there’s a higher power out there, but I don’t think it’s one god. There are countless gods in history, from the Greeks and Romans to the present day. How can one be “the one?”
With that in mind, picking up Tolstoy’s book and reading through it brought me back to those days of curiosity. It’s not so much choosing one religion to believe in but instead living a good, honorable life and having faith in always striving to be the best person you can be. And that’s why I believe my father kept this book on his shelf.
As I learned, this was the last project Tolstoy embarked upon before his death. The third book of a trilogy, it offers readers a sequence of thoughts for each day of the year. In his introduction, he hopes “the readers will experience the same benevolent and uplifting feeling that I experienced while working on its creation…” I’m going to keep this book front and center on my desk this year and read a passage each day as Tolstoy intended to discover if his thoughts will help me also live an even better life.